Because I care...

Dear Hot Sitters,

The life of a top rating game show host is a rich tapestry woven from many threads some of which are golden, some silver, some red, some blue, I think there’s some white ones in there and there’s a funny green one – anyway, it’s a busy life. But it’s not so busy that I can’t take the time to listen to the cries of those for whom the gold lame jacket of life will always be a size too large. You. The fans.

It was with this spirit of generosity that I read the following letter from a fan desperately in need of advice. So moved was I by his tale of woe that I thought it fitting that I publish it here in the hope that you, dear reader, might be motivated to help him in his hour of need.

Dear Uncle Bill,

 I lost my washing machine recently, actually I’ve lost two washing machines recently. Both to white goods-loving ex-girlfriends. The dirty laundry is piling up pretty deep, but I’m reluctant to buy a third for obvious reasons.  My question, oh wise Uncle Bill, is this? Should I buy a third washing machine, or should I spend the money instead on 500 pairs of dollar-a-pair underpants from Bi-Lo?

Regards,

On the Skids, Brunswick

What say ye Sitters? Where should our friend spend his loot in pursuit of a fresh seat? Post your responses below and feel free to ask me anything. I am after all, all yours… Uncle Bill.